I also work as an Executive Coach, and the root of my formation as a coach is Ontology (study of being).
It took me years to even get what ontology was, but slowly and surely, I got from the back seat to the driving seat of my car – so to speak – and finally put my hands firmly on the wheel.
Ontology has to do with awakening, and awakening is not a matter of an intellectual understanding; rather it is an experience, the difference being similar to that between knowing fire is hot and actually feeling the heat.
In my experience, no healthy human being, in their right mind, would prefer to pass this experience we call life, this gift we all share, “knowing about life” instead of living/experiencing life.
As an awakened human being, as I consider myself to be J, I am committed to, generate being in a humorous attitude. This is the only attitude saving me from the onslaughts of my “smarter than smart ego” and righteous indignation when confronted with sometimes incredible intellectual denseness;
intellectual denseness = lifelessness.
I like the expression used by a Zen master when a certain learned monk came to visit his monastery; addressing his attendant the Zen master said:
“show this lifeless fellow out”.
Intellectual denseness is the norm. We are surrounded by it like we are surrounded by air, we know no difference unless, by some miracle we escape it. Otherwise, all that it looks like is the blind being led by the blind.
One day I visited one of the participants of a PhotoReading course I led, the CEO of a subsidiary of a very big and successful Romanian company. Knowing each other in a clean authentic way, playing no games with each other (due to the coaching in the course itself) he was gracious enough to let his mask down and tell me he was really suffering.
I knew from the course, when we spoke in the breaks, that he was a fan of this big shot;)… he had followed him for years, went to his courses regardless the price and once even went to a course where he walked on coals. He was praising this guy and bragging about the money his company paid for him, and what was astonishing to me was that he seemed completely oblivious of the fact that in spite of all he was telling me he was in this sorry state of mind, and useless to his company. He was not qualified to be a courier boy, let alone the CEO.
He was telling me he had made up his mind to leave the company, that he could not work there anymore, but could not leave because his wife insisted they moved and he needed the money for the new house they had acquired. He seemed to have constraints all over.
His beautiful and huge office reflected lifelessness (he was playing on the computer when I got there), outside his office people seeming ‘too busy” to be really busy.
I asked him if he was willing to work with me for an hour.
He was brave enough to say yes J
In the end of one session this man became alive; he called the owner of the company and arranged a lunch meeting. Later he called me to let me know the outcome. He was back on track, full of enthusiasm, new relationship with his employer, respect and power restored.
That is the magic of ontological coaching:
when you unscramble your brains you can think for yourself.